Client: “Licenciada, we don’t know if our relationship can still be saved. So much has happened over the years, and it’s not the same anymore… We feel like strangers.”
Therapist: “Yes, if there is a genuine willingness to rebuild what you once had.”
“Where there was fire…”
A relationship can be restructured, rebuilt, healed, learned from, and recovered when both partners still care for each other and share a strong commitment to preserving the positive aspects of their relationship.
Key Behaviors for a Healthy Relationship
💙 Learn to Give and Receive: Affection should be mutual—exchange positive reinforcements, compliments, affection, or words of appreciation.
💙 Don’t Be Overly Sensitive: People who take offense easily make cohabitation difficult. Avoid feeling hurt over small issues.
💙 Pay Attention to Small Details: Make being together pleasant and enriching. Surprises help break the monotony and keep the connection alive.
💙 Avoid Unnecessary Arguments: Some discussions might provide relief, but they also leave scars and feed resentment.
💙 Resolve Conflicts Quickly: If an argument happens, don’t let it escalate into silent treatment for hours or days. Apologize or initiate reconciliation with a gesture of peace.
💙 Mind Your Manners: Words are important, but so are gestures. Respect, kindness, and understanding are essential in daily interactions.
💙 Bury the List of Offenses: When frustration builds up, don’t bring up past mistakes. Learn to stay silent or focus on solving the issue at hand.
💙 Choose the Right Moment: Timing matters. Avoid bringing up conflicts or sensitive topics at inappropriate moments.
💙 Protect Your Personal Space: Independence makes you more valued. A healthy relationship allows each partner to maintain their individuality, hobbies, and friendships.
💙 Become Communication Experts:
✔ Let your partner speak
✔ Listen actively
✔ Control your tone of voice
✔ Avoid assumptions—express what you need openly
💙 Reconnect Intimately:
Create special moments just for the two of you—without kids, family, or colleagues. Share quality time, like:
🎥 Going to the movies
🍽 A dinner date
🚶 A walk, holding hands
Seeking Support
If these steps feel challenging, consider seeking guidance from a therapist to develop and strengthen these relationship skills.
💙 Written by: Licda. Wendy Klingenberger