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Projection: Seeing Ourselves in Others

📝 Exercise:
Make a list of the positive and negative qualities you notice in people around you (without naming anyone). Are there certain traits that irritate you? Do you find yourself admiring other qualities, maybe even feeling a little envious?

Reflection on Matthew 7:3-5

“Why do you look at the speck in your brother’s eye but fail to notice the beam in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ while there is still a beam in your own? Hypocrite! First, remove the beam from your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.”

💡 Perspective:
When we point a finger at someone else, three fingers point back at us.

The reality of projection is illustrated here. We cannot see ourselves as we truly are—only through our reflections in others. In some way, the outside world acts as our mirror.

What is Projection?

According to Dr. Timothy Yen, a psychologist from California:

🧐 “Projection is unconsciously experiencing something internally and placing it onto another person.”

Essentially, the traits we strongly notice in others—whether they bother us or inspire us—often exist within us.

Seeing Ourselves in Others

🔄 Try this exercise:
1ïžâƒŁ Think of something that truly bothers you about someone.

  • Now, consider this as a reflection of yourself.
  • What does this trait reveal about you?
  • Example: I get annoyed by angry people. Why? Maybe I have anger within me that I haven’t acknowledged.

2ïžâƒŁ Now, do the same with a trait you admire in someone.

  • That, too, is a reflection of you.
  • Embrace it as a part of yourself.

🌿 Personal Story:
One winter, while studying Spiritual Companionship in Pecos, NM, I was mesmerized by the snowfall outside the classroom. Having lived in Guatemala for years, I hadn’t seen snow in a long time.

After class, I walked along the Pecos River, almost singing with joy, taking photos, and soaking in the beauty.

Suddenly, I realized—I was projecting.

The beauty I was seeing outside was actually a reflection of the beauty within me. What I was witnessing was my own inner landscape.